When you’re in first place in Mario Kart and shit starts going down behind you
A client and I were discussing which photos to upload to his website.
Client: I’ll get all the photos to you ASAP so you can edit them as agreed.
Me: Sounds great.
After five hours, I still hadn’t received any photos, so I rang the client.
Me: Hi - have you got…
Geometric watercolor-like tattoos by Russian based artist Sasha Unisex
i’m not one of those people that will preach unconditional sex positivity
because some people’s “kinks” are having sex with children
and rubbing their genitals on random people on the train
miss me with the lectures about “kink shaming”
because there is a line
and way too many people cross it
i’m laughing so hard at ben’s hand stuck in his pocket like he is so fucking awkward i love him so much all i can think about is that article about martin where the author was like “he doesn’t have cumberbatch’s swagger” like have…
I used to laugh so much about this. Not once in all the movies does a woman die on screen.
I hope that Jurassic World doesn’t break the canon.
MY BIRD IS SITTING IN THE TOP CORNER OF HER CAGE CALLING MY DOG’S NAME AND ASKING IF HE WANTS A TREAT AND IF HE WANTS TO GO TO OUTSIDE AND HE’S TOO STUPID TO REALIZE IT’S HER SO EVERYTIME SHE SAYS SOMETHING HE LOOKS AT ME LIKE
SHE LAUGHS EVERYTIME TOO AND NOW HE’S JUMPING ON ME AND BARKING AND GETTING MAD AT ME LIKE OLIVER TURN AROUND AND LOOK IN THAT HUGE ASS CAGE AND BEG HER FOR A FUCKING TREAT OR SOMETHING.
your bird is an asshole
YOU KNOW WHATS FUCKING STUPID
WHEN YOUR FAMILY MAKES YOU GO SOMEWHERE WITH THEM AND YOU TELL THEM YOU DONT WANT TO
AND THEN WHEN YOURE ALREADY OUT THEY BLAME YOU FOR BEING ALL ANGRY AND TELL YOU YOU RUIN EVERYTHING
OH WELL MY FUCKING APOLOGIES